For the next two coming weeks (starting this Friday, Jan 26th), my church will be starting our One Desire Fast where we fast from social media and meat in the 1st week, and choose to either have only one meal a day (no meat still) or survive on a liquids fast for the 2nd week (still continuing without social media).
The One Desire Fast makes me think about a lot of things related to this fast:
The excitement and nervousness days or weeks before the fast. The ālast supperā of eating as much meat as possible. The emptiness of not having meat. The nights at J2 (our resident dining hall) waiting in the egg line and eating tofu (apparently egg isnāt a meat). Many moments of heart checking.
The withdrawals. The gut-wrenching times of pulling myself away from auto-completing the Facebook or Youtube url in the Google search bar. The attempts to pray without distractions, but still feeling distracted. More heart checking.
The ālast vegetarian supperā where any solid food is inhaled before the liquid fast starts. A clear amount of groaning and visually tired look on the faces of people attempting the liquids fast. The hunger. The discomfort. Egg drop soup.
Days spent drinking nothing but peanut butter protein shakes at Freshens in Jester. The toilet experience (tmi). The pure moments of worship. The dependance on God. The long prayer times given to Him.
The heart checking.
With all these thoughts on my mind, you can tell one of the hardest things I wrestle with during this 2-week period is knowing where my heart is at.
The question I always have to ask is: What is my intention behind this fast?
Am I showing off my strength, ability, and endurance to not have social media, meat, or even food?
Am I being apathetic in my prayer, devotions, or worship and just waiting for the 2-weeks to be complete so I may go back to the usual time of daily living?
Am I really committing this time to God and going before Him with one desire ā loving Him with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength?
āAnd he answered, āYou shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.āā
- Luke 10:27 ESV
As I think about all these thoughts and questions, everything really points to one hope I have during the One Desire Fast. That God becomes my One Desire. Not only during this fast, or for this year, but in every single moment of my life.
By chopping off things like social media, food, Webtoons, and Youtube (rip), I am taking myself away from things of the world that give me momentary satisfaction, in order to appreciate and feast on an everlasting hope.
I donāt know where this One Desire Fast time will bring me to.
Maybe Iāll find myself in agonizing pain because I wonāt be updated for manga/Webtoons for the next 2 weeks (the horror O.O).
Maybe Iāll be utterly distracted (even though the goal of the One Desire Fast is to be free of distractions while focusing on God) because I wonāt have many of the things Iāve grown accustomed to and taken for granted.
Maybe Iāll get to meet God in an amazing, powerful, convicting way.
Who knows what will happen.
But I know one thing ā this time is meant for God.
I want to trust in Him for what He has in store in this time:
What He will show or do. How He will use and grow me. Where He will lead.
And in the end, as long as I seek Him out and make Him my One Desire, even if I have walk through dark valleys or climb up steep mountains, I know He will provide. He has amazing plans, and I will trust in Him in it.
āBut seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.ā
- Matthew 6:33 ESV
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.
- Jeremiah 29:11-13 ESV
Thanks for taking time to read my posts as always, friends. As I said in the post, Iāll be peace-ing out of social media for the next 2 weeks. Who knows if I will post any posts or reflection during this time, but if I do, yāall will probably be the first to know.
Anyways, continue fighting the good fight and running the race. Have a great weekend yāall, and Iāll see yāall in the next post! God Bless!
To His glory, and for our good,
Eric